We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I love you. Go after that dick
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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