I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
