If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
