but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
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sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.