I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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