you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
