i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I think my vagina is haunted
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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