Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize