We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
