You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.