So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
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