Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize