He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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