whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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