I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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