You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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