At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Randomize
