We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize