? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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