I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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