His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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