I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
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He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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