I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
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