My cat gives me a boner
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.