Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
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I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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