thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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