Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.

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  (847): Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one. http://tfl.nu/00mh
  Replies (4) Good night (1339) Bad night (1799) Order T-Shirt
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  (+33): View more from France

  I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.

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  (+33): I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing. http://tfl.nu/69za
  Replies (13) Good night (686) Bad night (1959) Order T-Shirt
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo

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  (803): You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo http://tfl.nu/7wt5
  Replies (35) Good night (3945) Bad night (493) Order T-Shirt
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"

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  (919): i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles" http://tfl.nu/049n
  Replies (63) Good night (12752) Bad night (983) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.

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  (703): the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week. http://tfl.nu/6di3
  Replies (17) Good night (4025) Bad night (1003) Order T-Shirt
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?

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  (504): she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud? http://tfl.nu/6q2n
  Replies (30) Good night (8957) Bad night (1082) Order T-Shirt
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.

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  (318): That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior. http://tfl.nu/48ho
  Replies (17) Good night (4985) Bad night (976) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.

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  (913): i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire. http://tfl.nu/gd8k
  Replies (6) Good night (5176) Bad night (775) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you

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  (314): I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you http://tfl.nu/08lz
  Replies (3) Good night (3719) Bad night (668) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up

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  (217): i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up http://tfl.nu/r4jy
  Replies (6) Good night (2434) Bad night (655) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.

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  (207): It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it. http://tfl.nu/yxow
  Replies (4) Good night (2334) Bad night (695) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.

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  (707): nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids. http://tfl.nu/kj6p
  Replies (11) Good night (2572) Bad night (435)
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  (334): View more from Alabama

  Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?

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  (334): Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything? http://tfl.nu/366l
  Replies (9) Good night (558) Bad night (1418) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.

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  (630): She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up. http://tfl.nu/iahr
  Replies (2) Good night (910) Bad night (303) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!

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  (541): Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE! http://tfl.nu/iu61
  Replies (5) Good night (681) Bad night (226) Order T-Shirt

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