I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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