come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
Randomize
