Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize