You're completely useless in the revolution.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
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you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
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It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
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