she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
