I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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