so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
