Texts From Last Night

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  (917): View more from New York City

  I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.

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  (917): I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop. http://tfl.nu/w9jv
  Replies (3) Good night (1708) Bad night (836)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex

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  (215): I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex http://tfl.nu/ohto
  Replies (7) Good night (1906) Bad night (959)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you

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  (509): Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you http://tfl.nu/tpo5
  Replies (30) Good night (13971) Bad night (1128)
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  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.

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  (414): the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details. http://tfl.nu/93dt
  Replies (26) Good night (6541) Bad night (746)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"

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  (814): I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?" http://tfl.nu/d4r4
  Replies (120) Good night (1826) Bad night (4698)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth

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  (619): I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth http://tfl.nu/3dui
  Replies (15) Good night (2874) Bad night (2460)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable

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  (914): vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable http://tfl.nu/smln
  Replies (12) Good night (4304) Bad night (717)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.

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  (416): I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock. http://tfl.nu/lwgf
  Replies (14) Good night (3416) Bad night (1397)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.

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  (407): 50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin. http://tfl.nu/4pfl
  Replies (10) Good night (2171) Bad night (1005)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.

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  (770): You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL. http://tfl.nu/941m
  Replies (3) Good night (1033) Bad night (581)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.

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  (404): You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody. http://tfl.nu/yk6b
  Replies (3) Good night (1221) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.

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  (608): Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants. http://tfl.nu/jnxo
  Replies (4) Good night (875) Bad night (446)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  answer my text you professional douchebag

  (914): View more from New York

  and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible

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  (914): answer my text you professional douchebag (914): and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible http://tfl.nu/dtk0
  Replies (0) Good night (876) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (905): View more from Ontario

  downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.

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  (905): downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade. http://tfl.nu/mls1
  Replies (4) Good night (955) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (818): View more from California

  Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.

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  (818): Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail. http://tfl.nu/0wm6
  Replies (1) Good night (380) Bad night (514)

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