Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet. http://tfl.nu/g9yd
  Replies (0) Good night (1350) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I just saw a hot homeless man

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): I just saw a hot homeless man http://tfl.nu/z026
  Replies (18) Good night (1223) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right? http://tfl.nu/c996
  Replies (20) Good night (2346) Bad night (1177)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial. http://tfl.nu/6p87
  Replies (49) Good night (6508) Bad night (2891)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless. http://tfl.nu/hmfp
  Replies (9) Good night (3087) Bad night (851)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  One blow job doesn not make me gay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): One blow job doesn not make me gay. http://tfl.nu/ismv
  Replies (86) Good night (2950) Bad night (8429)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing http://tfl.nu/df9u
  Replies (6) Good night (2103) Bad night (891)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one? http://tfl.nu/9wky
  Replies (13) Good night (1269) Bad night (1936)
• Favorite

  (713): View more from Texas

  Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (713): Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out? http://tfl.nu/0l6b
  Replies (7) Good night (1924) Bad night (609)
• Favorite

  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (423): I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt. http://tfl.nu/6dgk
  Replies (5) Good night (1014) Bad night (645)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry." http://tfl.nu/xw8s
  Replies (9) Good night (448) Bad night (905)
• Favorite

  (586): View more from Michigan

  He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (586): He probably thinks you're playing hard to get. (248): Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone. http://tfl.nu/1zpx
  Replies (1) Good night (1394) Bad night (381)
• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free. http://tfl.nu/dxth
  Replies (0) Good night (876) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore http://tfl.nu/vhu2
  Replies (2) Good night (250) Bad night (399)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  there was so much lube in my brother's closet...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): there was so much lube in my brother's closet... http://tfl.nu/yytv
  Replies (2) Good night (348) Bad night (904)

Randomize