worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK