someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
We don't watch enough power rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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