He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.