I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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