He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach