I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list