I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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