Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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