It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize