No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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