I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize