hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
