My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Randomize
