dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
i know! what is this dateline?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.