just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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