Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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