if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize